By Barbara Poole

Now that Thanksgiving has come and gone, we are in the thick of the holiday season. There is a full menu of celebrations with both friends and family, as well as the infamous Office Party.

For many of you, this involves not only your own holiday gathering but also the get-together for your spouse’s or partner’s work group. If it feels like work, that’s because it is. But take heart; you can have a lot of fun in the process, too, as long as you bear in mind a few guidelines that will make this event a career builder instead of a career breaker for you.

Before you head out into the night, consider these do’s and don’ts for how to relish the party without regretting the aftermath:

• DO accept the invitation and make arrangements to go. These affairs might as well say “mandatory” on the invitation. Yes, you can rebel and be a no-show; however, know that your attendance is often viewed as a sign that you’re a team player and a company person. You don’t have to plan to stay all evening; in fact, it’s not a good idea to camp out until the wee hours of the morning. But do plan to put in an appearance for at least an hour and be gracious and social while you are there.

• DO recognize that although it’s billed as a party, it’s still a time to be on top of your game. Conduct yourself as though this occasion is simply an extension of how you interface with people every day on the job. Relax and have fun, but don’t consider this an opportunity to let your hair down and let it all hang out.

• DO eat and drink in moderation. The tales of people who have overindulged at company parties are legendary, and there’s usually a price to be paid, if only with the embarrassment factor. Limit your alcohol consumption and drink plenty of water or seltzer between drinks. Remember that the hors d’oeuvres table is not intended to be a five-course meal. Enjoy the spread, but leave some for the rest of the guests.

• DO make sure you know who is really invited to the party. Not all office soirees are intended for spouses and children. And if you bring a date or a friend, make sure that person is someone who will mix well with the people who are present. You don’t want to have to apologize later for your guest.

• DO keep your conversation positive and upbeat. This is not the occasion to get into whining or complaining or commenting on the newest company policy. Avoid controversial topics such as religion or politics, and make sure that the jokes you tell are clean and above-board.

• DO make it a point to thank the host and/or hostess when you leave. Regardless of how large the crowd, avoid the temptation to simply cut and run when you’ve had enough.

• DON’T pull out your skimpiest outfit for the party. Dress should be festive but conservative and appropriate to the occasion. Leave your provocative and daring ensembles for the parties your personal friends will be having. Likewise, don’t under- or overdress. Have a sense of what’s appropriate for the venue where the party will be held.

• DON’T flirt with the cute guy down the hall, especially if he’s married. Even if you have your eye on a certain someone from the office, the company party is not the time and place to act out your fantasies.

• DON’T bring a tasteless gag gift for the annual gift exchange. It’s bound to make someone uncomfortable, and it’s guaranteed to show up at the office on Monday where it won’t seem nearly so funny.

• DON’T assume everyone observes and celebrates the same holiday. “Merry Christmas” may be appropriate for those who you know well who celebrate this tradition, but “Happy Holidays” is a safer greeting for those who may honor a different occasion.

• DON’T spend all evening talking business, or you will forever be labeled the office bore. Be tasteful in your conversation, but find topics for discussion other than just the latest project you’re working on.

Have fun at your office party, and enjoy the company of colleagues and co-workers. Just remember that the event is a fishbowl and the Monday-morning quarterbacks will be out in force rehashing who did what. Safeguard your career by mixing a little caution with that glass of champagne.

Barbara Poole is a leadership and career development coach with Charleston-based Success Builders Inc. Contact her at CoachBarbara@SuccessBuildersInc.com.

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