By Bob Bouyea

I am sprawl.

More accurately, I am a part of the sprawl that is happening around the Charleston area. And with this sprawl comes some headaches: namely, traffic. And that is what frustrates people into fits of road rage. I participate in the early morning rush hour gridlock. And I participate in the evening crawl home.

As I look around at the other drivers, they all seem resigned to the fact that they will be traveling at speeds of up to 15 mph. (Have you noticed that when you do reach that top speed you think to yourself, “Wow, we’re really moving?”)

My commute begins around 7 a.m. I turn out of my development in Dorchester County onto Dorchester Road, drive about one-quarter mile on a good day, and come to a stop because of traffic. From there, I creep along for the next four miles until I get through the stoplight just west of Ashley Phosphate Road. So after 15 minutes, I’m five miles from my front door. (Let’s do the math: That’s averaging 20 mph.)

Once I turn on Ashley Phosphate Road, traffic isn’t too bad. There are only a few places where there’s a bit of a slow down, but not bad.

Then there is I-26. As I turn onto the on-ramp, below is a mass of metal: cars and trucks slowing down as lanes merge into each other. I begin strategically planning my maneuvers knowing that my end goal is to be in the far left lane. So I look for holes in which my truck will fit. I adjust my speed to time my first merge just right. In I go.

Next I keep one eye on the traffic ahead and one eye affixed to the side-view mirror, waiting for my opportunity to merge without smacking the car ahead of me. I employ this tactic until I’m completely in the far left hand lane. Then it’s back to creeping along until I’m past the I-526 exit. Once past this point it’s smooth sailing. I’m at the office in about 45 minutes. That’s roughly 25 miles door to door.

In the evening it’s about the same, although the slow downs are for several miles along I-26 where traffic is funneling onto the interstate from other roads.

I don’t want to give you the wrong impression. I’m not complaining about my commute. I knew there would be traffic. And let’s put it into perspective. Prior to moving here, I had a 14-mile commute. On a good, accident-free day, I could get to work in 35 minutes. But one little fender bender would increase my commute to more than an hour.

And that commute really wasn’t bad compared to what those of you who have moved here from the Northeast have experienced.

My point is that the issues I, and thousands of other area commuters, face today could be easily reduced through some seemingly minor adjustments to the timing of traffic lights. But that would help only in the short term. Building more developments without major changes to our infrastructure will only magnify the problems and people’s frustrations. Infrastructure improvements need to be made before the people come. And only a cooperative effort by all municipalities can make it happen.

What’s in a name

If you’re like me, you want to exercise to keep you in shape, but there doesn’t seem to be enough hours in a day. The other day as I was vegging out in the “Captain’s Chair,” (I know, I know, I could have been exercising) I saw a product that even a guy like me could, and would, use.

The name screams exactly what I need. And the commercial says it is easy, to boot. (There has to be a marketing genius behind this one.)

What is it, you ask? It is the AB Lounge. Who couldn’t use this? I could be exercising while lounging. Imagine, doing the crunch-type exercises with the remote in one hand and a cola, make that a diet cola, in the other. What a great concept. If you haven’t seen it, the AB Lounge resembles a beach chair that sort of rocks back and forth. You sit down, put your feet up, and I imagine, you can almost watch the pounds melt away while developing six-pack abs in the process. Now what could be easier?

I am going to order the luxury model: The one with the cup holder and chip storage pouch. What? They don’t make that? Well, they should. Then it would be perfect.

Final word

OK. I have one more sign issue. Have you ever tried to find your way out of downtown Charleston and onto Highway 17 or I-26? If you’re not familiar with downtown streets it can be quite difficult. Mainly, that is because the signs are hidden behind overgrown trees and bushes.

There is a town in California called Bodega Bay (where the Alfred Hitchcock movie The Birds was filmed), that didn’t like having an interstate sign pointing out the exit for the town. Basically, town folk didn’t want outsiders coming in and messing up their quaint little community. So every time the Department of Transportation put up a sign, it mysteriously disappeared.

It seems like the reverse is the case in Charleston. Instead of keeping you out, they want to keep you in. That, however, isn’t a bad option.

Bob Bouyea is executive editor of the Business Journal. E-mail him at bbouyea@crbj.com.

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