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| 06/18/09 Boy, I had a crazy weekend. Before I catch you up on that, I think I’ll just get the surf forecast over with. Things once again do not look too hopeful. There’s all kinds of swell out there, but it’s heading in all kinds of directions. Just not ours. So your best hope is to try and catch some residual ankle-snappers around mid-tide. And bring your longboard – and maybe a book to read. Last week, the surf was weird and flat, so it was the perfect time to take a couple of furlough days and for Mrs. Blog and me to attend the seventh annual Hukilau in Fort Lauderdale. What’s a Hukilau, you ask? Well, kiddies, it’s a four-day festival celebrating the Polynesian pop culture that reached it’s zenith in the late 1950s. Being a fan of most things mid-century modern, and a surfer, it’s sort of a natural fit.
It was great to spend the weekend among fellow pop culture aficionados and immerse ourselves in sights and sounds. It was also special to once again visit the Mai Kai. The Mai Kai is a perfectly preserved Polynesian Restaurant built in 1956. They still have a tropical floorshow that’s been running for more than 50 years and is an absolute hoot. The Mai Kai is a true treasure of Americana from the days when the height of your tail fins and the hipness of your bachelor pad could set you apart from the crowd. If you are ever in Fort Lauderdale, do yourself a favor and go take a ride in this Polynesian time machine. On the way down to Lauderdale, Mrs. Blog and I stopped in on an old friend in central Florida. After a leisurely dinner, we jumped back on the road and headed south. After getting lost for a little while, we decided to call it quits and get a motel for the night. We figured Orlando would be a good spot to find a place to sleep and decided to see what the downtown area had to offer. It looked rather interesting from the Interstate with all the high-rises lit up at night. It was about 11:30 when we hit the downtown exit. For a Thursday night, the place was really jumping. I mean, REALLY jumping. Most of the streets were blocked off and people were walking and partying everywhere. Mrs. Blog and I kept saying to each other that downtown Orlando on a weeknight was a rocking place. A giant block party Thursday nights in downtown Orlando? Who knew? But there just wasn’t a motel anywhere and we were getting pretty tired. Finally, at about a quarter to midnight, we spotted a giant high-rise with Crowne Plaza emblazoned on it. The only problem was that every road leading to it was blocked off by temporary “Road Closed” barriers. It was getting critical, so I said to Mrs. Blog to heck with it, I’m turning in anyway. As soon as I did, I almost ran over a giant nest of dismounted motorcycle cops. Must have been at least 15 of them. The closest one to me motioned me to stop, and it went like this: Orlando Cop: “Sir, did you see that giant sign that said ROAD CLOSED DO NOT ENTER?” Surfblogger: “I was only trying to get to that motel.” Orlando Cop: “License, please.” Mrs. Blog: “Officer, we’re not from around here and we just want to find a place to sleep.” Orlando Cop: “License, please.” After I handed him my license, he went away, I assume to look me up in the database of habitual blockade runners. While he was gone Mrs. Blog and I discussed how expensive this little nightmare was going to be, and I assured her she would look cute in the little orange jumpsuit with matching bracelets. Then: Orlando Cop: “Mr. Johnson, have you ever heard of the Orlando Magic?” Surfblogger: “I, er, a, um…” Sound of sand crunching in gears. I’ve heard of the Magic Kingdom, I remember Tinkerbell and the little wand. Let’s see, it’s Sunday night, the TV is black and white, Walt looks really kind, there’s some fireworks over a big castle, everybody’s happy. I seen a peanut stand and heard a rubber band. I've seen a needle that winked its eye. But I been done seen about everything when I see an elephant fly. It’s a small world after all… that’s it - maybe all the Orlando cops work for Disney and we have to listen to some kind of promo like signing up to tour a time share or buy a koozie with a mouse on it... “I, well, officer, remember my childhood fondly…” Orlando Cop: “Mr. Johnson, the Orlando Magic is a basketball team. And right now, they are playing another basketball team called the L.A. Lakers ABOUT 300 YARDS FROM WHERE I’M STANDING - IN THE NBA FINALS.” Mrs. Blog: “Oh my god!” Orlando Cop: “Mr. Johnson, do me a favor?” Surfblogger: “Anything, sir.” Orlando Cop: “You see that line of cars behind you that we have pulled over?” Surfblogger: “Yessir.” Orlando Cop: “Even though there is no way the Plaza will have a room, pull in there anyway and ask, so I can justify to all those people behind you getting tickets why I’m letting you go.” The people at the Plaza were very nice. It sometimes pays to be a free-range idiot. |
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